Wednesday, January 11, 2017

Dreams Find the Means - Two Years at Home

Yesterday marked two years since I left my career as a Paralegal to become a stay at home mom. Piper wasn't even born until two weeks later. I remember those two weeks "alone" very vividly. Those weeks were so sweet as I anticipated the arrival of our Piper Grace.

I spent a lot of my time alone those weeks reading the Bible. I prayed daily that leaving my career was the right choice. Every time I prayed on it, I would start out with a load of doubt and by the time I finished, I was left with the feeling that there was no other choice for me. It was clear to me in those moments that I belonged at home during this precious time of Piper's infancy {even though I didn't know quite how we'd manage financially}.

When I left my job, my initial hope was that we would make it through the first year at home before I would have to leave Piper to find a job outside of the house. I wasn't even sure how we'd make it through that first year but, as I've said before, I believe dreams find the means.

While it's easy to dream, it can be scary to actually follow your dreams. I had some people doubt me and my ability to stay at home, financially and otherwise. Not like it was their business, but they wanted to know how could I afford to stay at home? I was a little taken back when I was first asked that question, mostly because the true answer was "I don't know". That's when a phrase couldn't have rung more true in my heart; dreams find the means.

If you would have asked me when I was sitting in my boss's office at eight months pregnant {working up the nerve to tell her I was quitting the career that I loved to stay at home with my child} whether or not I'd still be at home two years later; I don't know if I'd believe you. 

Sure, I knew that I wanted to stay at home with my baby. I knew that I didn't want to drive a 45 minute commute twice a day, missing out on quality time with my girl. I knew that I didn't want to miss the smiles, the giggles, the milestones. I just didn't know if I could do it; financially and otherwise.

Despite not knowing what motherhood was truly like and if we could truly afford me to be without work, I made the decision to leave my job to stay at home with my baby. It was one of the hardest and easiest decisions I've ever had to make in my life. Two years later now, I can also say that it was the best decision of my life.

Whenever I quit my job, my goal was to make it as a stay at home mom for the first year of my daughter's life. My daughter is turning two in a couple weeks now and I'm still here; I'm still at home. God is good.

There are times now when I still find myself thinking about my old career. I miss some of the people I worked with. I miss contributing in the ways I was able to when I worked as a Paralegal in a Child Welfare System. I miss the work. That's where my at-home home decor business comes in.



About 6 months into being a stay at home mom, I was still feeling the void of leaving my career. So, I began a home decor business from the desk in my dining room. My business is called "Anything Rustic" and we are a very, very small family business. We always intend to stay a small, small business. We may be small but the rewards are great. I get to satisfy my need to contribute my talents and still be where I am needed most; at home.

I have some great things planned for my little business this year, and so the sting of being away from my career for two years now is less of a sting and more of a pleasant reminder that I am right where I belong.

2 comments:

  1. Good for you! My son is turning 5 in March and I have been able to stay home with him for the last two years. I used to work full time at an office and felt terrible being away from him, so I looked into becoming a freelance administrative assistant so that I could work from home and that's what I've been doing for two years and I love it!

    ReplyDelete
  2. As I get closer and closer to my maternity leave, I'm really struggling with this because as much as I would love to work from home (freelance design/illustration) during my baby's early years, I am fearful of not having steady work/pay check/insurance. It is awesome that you were able to face that fear and it's been going so well for you. Hope it stays that way!

    ReplyDelete