Friday, May 22, 2020

11 Weeks Pregnant with Baby #2

Hello, and happy Friday! This was my husband's first full week back to work since March and so, Friday is a very exciting day, again! At just over 11 weeks pregnant, I cannot wait for the chance to sleep in tomorrow morning.

Now that Nick is back to work, I am working from home with my 5 year old daughter a couple days a week. Working from home wasn't as hard as I thought it would be this week. The first day was a little rough but, the second day couldn't have gone any better! Being able to take my laptop outside on the nice-weather days really helps. I think we're working on figuring out a rhythm that works best for us, already!

At 11 weeks pregnant, I have been seeing some improvements while also struggling a bit. The improvement is that my nausea is starting to fade! It's so incredible to be free of that nagging nausea feeling all times of the day and night! 

I have been struggling, however, with some intense fatigue and back issues. I actually had to call in a chiropractor on their day off to help me with my back issues because my rib had slipped (I suspect it happened when I was dealing with some morning sickness) and the rib being out made it difficult to take a full breath without intense pain. She was able to fix it so I could breathe again, but I have still been having pain and have been generally uncomfortable because of my back issues this week. My actual chiropractor is back from surgery next week, and I cannot wait to see her again!

Another benefit of working from home is that I haven't actually had to wear jeans or any other kind of pants that aren't either sweat pants or pajama pants. I am actually nervous to try on jeans again because I suspect they will no longer fit, and feel super uncomfortable. 

The bump is starting to grow! Dresses are going to be my friend this summer!

Wednesday, May 13, 2020

10 Weeks Pregnant with Baby #2

I'm 10 weeks pregnant today (with baby #2) and I finally had no choice but to give in to morning sickness this morning. That's just about as fun as I remember it being in Piper's pregnancy. Bleh.

As hard as morning sickness and extreme afternoon/evening fatigue is, I've been finding reassurance in the pregnancy symptoms. That may just be part of being a pregnancy-loss mom (x3).

The wait between my 7 week sonogram and 12 week sonogram has been... long. Thankfully I'm over halfway through the wait. Only two weeks to go!

As for my eating lately, peanut butter toast has been about the only thing I can stomach first thing when I wake up. I eat frequently in the mornings (every hour or two), which is so different than my norm. Ice cold smoothies have been so satisfying after I have my pb toast. 

I have been loving grilled cheese and tomato soup for lunch, which usually gets eaten around 11am. I've been ready to eat dinner around 3pm, and usually make myself eat one more time before bed, just to help with the morning sickness. Carbs have been 85% of my diet during this first trimester!

While the first trimester has been a little challenging, it really hasn't been too horrible. I am just so happy to be pregnant right now, with this baby we've been praying for, for years. 

I am also happy to be going through the first trimester during this (very chilly) Spring and season of sheltering in place. I haven't had to miss out on much due to not feeling well because there isn't much to miss out on right now. I will be going into my second trimester, and gaining more energy in my days just as summer begins. I am so looking forward to the second trimester and this summer!

Wednesday, May 6, 2020

First Trimester: Week 3 - 8 | Baby #2

I am 9 weeks pregnant today! I woke up feeling a little more "normal" today! I had a couple days with some intense morning (all day) sickness/dizziness this past weekend. The fatigue really wiped me out, too. Yesterday and today, however, have been much better days! Praising God for every day!

I have been trying to keep track of my pregnancy symptoms ever since the pregnancy test turned positive on March 26th. I was only 3 weeks and 1 day pregnant at the time! I knew in my heart this baby was strong from the very beginning.

Week 3:
- Extra tired (by 6pm each night)
- Early bedtimes (around 8pm)
- Hardening feeling in uterus (3/25)
- Face randomly feeling warm/flushed
- Slight cramping
- Sense of smell increasing

Week 4:
- Cramping
- Very tired and emotional in the evenings
- Bedtime routinely around 6pm
- Lots of blood work
- HCG was rising appropriately

Week 5:
- Morning sickness began! Nausea and light heartburn. (never been so happy to be sick!)
- Bedtime still between 6 - 7pm
- Mood swings in full force
- Cramping was dwindling
- Light spotting but emergency sono showed all was well and the heartbeat (100bpm)
- Cravings began! Craving salty food, hot fudge sundaes (never really cared for them before), voodoo chips and cheeseburgers (Nick went to my moms at 9pm one night to pick up ground beef and grilled a cheeseburger for me. Craving satisfied!)

Week 6:
- Very tired in the afternoons, naps help
- Bedtime still between 6 - 8pm
- Extra emotional in the evenings
- Cramping no longer happening
- Nauseous if I don't eat every 2-3 hours
- Aversion to chicken wings (a previous favorite of mine)
- Craving: red meat, salt and ice cream/sweets

Week 7:
- Bedtime between 7 - 8pm
- Morning sickness is getting stronger/lasting most of the day
- We had another sonogram and saw the heartbeat (163 bpm)
- We told Piper the news! She checks on the baby daily and prays for it's health and strength!
- Hungry for dinner at 3pm most days
- Experiencing more aversions than cravings this week
- Craving: Arby's beef and cheddar sandwich
- Strong aversion to chicken

Week 8:
- Bedtime stretching to 7 - 9pm most nights now
- Evening mood swings are still happening
- Starting to have more aversions to foods/meats but finding that it's not bad once I take a bite
- Morning (all day) sickness / fatigue / dizziness was strong for a few days this week
- Also had a few days this week where I didn't feel sick much at all and it was great
- Craving: peanut butter toast, scrambled eggs, pretzel salad

I'll post another update like this once around 14 weeks! Until then, keep an eye out for different updates along the way. We are so grateful to be on this journey with Baby #2!

Monday, May 4, 2020

Jesus Will Not Let Us Sink

Hello! If you missed our special announcement, you can find it here: Baby #2!

We have been praying for this second child for so many years. For those of you who were around when we first got our new-to-us SUV - that's a good marker of just how long we've been waiting and praying. 

Two years. Two miscarriages. We've fought through fear and heartache after heartache for you, Baby #2.

Our most recent miscarriage was in January, so I was surprised when just a month later, around Ash Wednesday, I felt the call to begin trying to conceive again. I was paralyzed with fear, which led me to giving up fear for Lent.

And let me just talk about giving up fear for Lent. It’s much different than giving up chocolate, right? I mean to give up chocolate means you don’t eat the chocolate. But fear is a natural part of being human. So how do you give it up?

I found the answer in 1 Peter 5:6-7
6 Humble yourselves, therefore, under God’s mighty hand that He May lift you up in due time. 7 Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.

I’m definitely not an expert in this, but the way I went about it was a very simple but effective approach. Daily, hourly I was just being honest with myself and God about my fear. When a fear would arise, I’d say (either out loud or in my head) “Lord I give this to you, and I trust you”. After some time of being obedient in this, I felt the release of those fears and I did feel my trust in Him grow.

In the first few weeks of Lent, God was faithful to show me new areas where fear was also hiding. Anger, frustration, irritation. Fear was at the root of so many of those emotions. When he revealed that to me, instead of feeling shame for those feelings, I felt such grace for myself. And that is what he wants for us.

Galatians 5:1 “For freedom Christ has set us free; stand firm therefore, and do not submit again to a yoke of slavery.”

So after a few weeks, with my fear and all the things that come with it being release daily to God, we were able to step out in trust in this new journey of trying to conceive Baby #2.

Now, we are newly pregnant, during a pandemic. And for somebody whose core weakness is fear, I, like many of us in this season, feel like I’m on a seesaw of feeling His peace and the world’s panic.

Which brings me to the scripture where Peter stepped out in trust onto the water with Jesus, and was so quickly taken by fear in Matthew 14:28-31.

It says, 28 “Lord, if it’s you,” Peter replied, “tell me to come to you on the water.” 29 “Come,” he said. Then Peter got down out of the boat, walked on the water and came toward Jesus. 30 But when he saw the wind, he was afraid and, beginning to sink, cried out, “Lord, save me!” 31 Immediately Jesus reached out his hand and caught him. “You of little faith,” he said, “why did you doubt?”

I don’t know about you, but I can so relate to Peter right now.

Jesus asked Nick and I to step out into the water IN TRUST, then the winds pick up, and we’re hit with a pandemic at the same time when the pregnancy test turns positive.

I’m wondering if any of you can think about a time when God has called you out into the deep and the winds picked up?

God is so good to have given me peace in those first days after finding out we’re pregnant again, it really was a sense of peace beyond understanding. But this hasn't been a completely smooth ride for us. The winds of fear picked up a couple weeks ago and had me feeling like I was sinking. During week 5 of this pregnancy, we had a scare with some spotting and I was sent in to get an emergency sonogram. Nick wasn’t able to come with me, and probably won’t be able to be with me for any future appointments for a while. Thankfully, I was able to see the baby’s heartbeat and got reassurance from the doctors that everything was continuing to look good. As for me, it took a while to be convinced that this wasn’t the end of yet another pregnancy. My immediate reaction was to assume that this was just the start of another storm.

But things are okay. The baby is doing so well! We are 8 weeks and 5 days along in this pregnancy, now.

There were many times over the past few weeks when I called out, "Lord, save me". And I imagined Him reaching out His hand to me like he did for Peter.

God is faithful to begin a new and good work in us exactly when we need it. I can see His faithfulness in preparing us for these moments as He nudged me to begin working intimately with him on my fear on Ash Wednesday, and if I hadn’t begun then, I don’t know how well I’d be handling everything right now.

I know there may be times when you also feel like you’re sinking, and I just want to remind you that if we call to Him, He is faithful to immediately extend His hand to us, like He did for Peter.

If we call to Him, Jesus will not let us sink.

Friday, May 1, 2020

Our Special Announcement - Baby #2

Sharing our joy! Blessed to announce Baby #2 is coming to town this December, 2020!

Piper is so excited for her little sibling to arrive this winter!

I am a little over 8 weeks pregnant now, and just feeling so incredibly blessed. During our last ultrasound, baby's heart rate was 163 and growing perfectly on track for December 9th due date. Now that we've announced this blessing to all of our friends and family, I am excited to start blogging more about it, soon!

For [these children] we have prayed.
1 Samuel 1:27