It’s been well over a month since I’ve been focused on eating in a calorie deficit and the scale knows it. I weighed in at 225 today. That’s 5 lbs up from a month ago and 10 lbs up from my lowest in the Spring.
I still don't feel ready to challenge myself as I had been when I was losing weight, but as I saw that number on the scale I know that I must. I cannot let the scale slowly creep back up and erase all the work I’ve done.
Of course it’s not the scale doing this, it’s me. I’m the one making poor eating choices. I’m the one not eating until 3pm and then eating double what I would have because I’m so hungry. I’m the one completely out of balance and out of touch with what I truly want: better health and wellness.
I’ve completely ignored my own goals and my long-term desires of better health and wellness. I traded them in for short-term gratification and succumbed to poor coping in a busy season.
I have grace for myself, but I also know that I haven’t even been trying. I want to try again but it feels risky. It feels risky because nothing is changing except for my desire to do better. We still have family in town and we are still scheduled out to the brim of our capacity.
Nothing changes if nothing changes, right? So, what can I change?
Focus. I can change my focus.
I can focus on what I will eat throughout the day. That’s where I will start.
